We’re Born to Thrive—So Why Aren’t We?
We are literally born to thrive.
So why does it feel so out of reach for many of us?
We’ve got more tools, research, and “wellness” advice than ever before—and yet, people are lonelier, more distracted, and more burned out.
So maybe the problem isn’t that we just need more motivation.
Maybe it’s the environment we’re trying to thrive in.
“My mission in life is not merely to survive, but to thrive; and to do so with some passion, some compassion, some humor, and some style.”
— Maya Angelou
What Does It Really Take to Thrive?
Thriving might look different for each of us—but here’s what’s universally true: Those who are truly thriving (not just surviving or barely scraping by) are well across five key domains.
In fact, these are built into our very biology—hardwired into who we are as human beings.
Think of it this way: long before standing desks or wellness retreats, we were already doing the things that helped us thrive. As hunter-gatherers, our daily lives aligned with what our minds and bodies needed most. Now, we’re expected to replicate those natural rhythms in environments that make it nearly impossible.
Here are the five universal themes for thriving that apply to all of us:
We are…
Born to move - we evolved through movement, we are designed to move!
Born to eat whole foods - our jaw structure is designed to eat fibrous, whole foods for steady energy throughout the day
Born to focus - we love to “get in the zone” and into that state of flow
Born to connect - we crave meaningful connection, no matter how introverted we are
Born to restore - our bodies need rest and recovery to rebuild (and reboot)
We all know that the pursuit of one or two of the above themes isn’t enough to live a thriving life. Really, we need a healthy mix of all five. Does that sound REALLY hard and daunting to do alone? Well, that’s because it is.
What’s Getting in the Way?
We have all been told to live our best life; that to thrive, we just need to do this, not that, optimize ourselves, and hustle harder. And when that doesn’t work, the story shifts to a more motivational approach: “If they can do it, so can you.” Or, better yet - “If I can do it, so can you.”
While it sounds good, there are three big problems with it:
It’s just not working:
About 95% of diets fail, with most people regaining the weight within 1–5 years (OSU Health).
In a Biggest Loser follow-up study, 13 of 14 contestants regained most of the weight, and their metabolisms stayed suppressed, burning 700 fewer calories per day than before (NIH).
It deflects accountability. The “just fix yourself” narrative gives a hall pass to the larger forces at play—everything from food systems to toxic work culture to tech that’s designed to distract.
It undermines collective action. We’ve been conditioned to think that if we’re not thriving, it’s our own fault. So instead of changing the system, we blame ourselves.
The Forces Around Us
It’s as if there’s a movement working against us instead of for us. These invisible forces—where we live, learn, work, grow up, and grow old— are our social determinants of health, accounting for as much as 80-90% of our overall wellbeing (CDC).
In other words, we can’t just look inward—we have to look outward. We need to stop asking, “What’s wrong with me?” And start asking instead: “What’s being done to me?”
So What Can We Do Actually to Thrive?
We just need to change the way we live, work, learn, and play… easy, right? Not at all: While these forces are bigger than any one of us, they are not bigger than all of us.
There is no self-help silver bullet; there’s the hard work of looking upstream, changing the water, and taking good old-fashioned collective action. As the saying goes, “If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go together.”
We can begin by taking three steps:
Be curious – Ask the big questions, together.
Be well – Each person plays their part in building a culture where we can all thrive.
Be a new kind of leader – The old framework no longer fits. Leaders need to lead differently to meet the moment.
Proof That It’s Possible: The Smoking Cessation Movement
Take the smoking cessation movement as an example. Early on, we understood that smoking was harmful, but it was framed as an individual problem, a matter of personal choice. Eventually, we recognized why so many people couldn’t just “quit”: tobacco companies were intentionally creating highly addictive products and marketing them aggressively. That’s when things changed. We recognized that in order for us to do well, we needed to create the conditions in which we could be well. So we took collective action. We passed legislation, added warning labels, created smoking and non-smoking sections (remember those on airplanes?), and eventually banned smoking in most public spaces. By changing the environment, we changed the norm. Smoking stopped being seen as “normal” because collectively, we made it easier for people to be well.
What If Workplaces Did the Same?
We have made significant strides in the workplace, recognizing that companies have a responsibility to provide more than just the essentials to their employees. Better yet, it is widely acknowledged that engaged workers are more productive, more profitable, and stay longer (Gallup). We’ve now known this for years, and people are ready for leaders to lead differently.
Instead of hoping that individual employees take it upon themselves to improve their wellbeing, we can equip leaders with the tools to become multipliers of wellbeing and sow the seeds for a thriving culture.
The truth is we can’t wellness our way out of a system designed for burnout. Let’s build better.
Thriving at work shouldn’t be a luxury—it should be the norm. That’s why I’m thrilled to announce a new LinkedIn Live series: Wellbeing at Work, in partnership with the Workplace Wellbeing Initiative of the Global Wellness Institute.
Each month, I’ll be joined by a powerhouse guest to dig into what it really takes to create workplaces where people thrive—not just survive.
Follow me on LinkedIn to catch each conversation and be part of the movement.